Thankskilling 3

mv5bmtu0njewndq5nf5bml5banbnxkftztgwmdyyodqyote-_v1_ux182_cr00182268_al_

0 stars

Colorful, garish, lot’s of cool puppets but beyond dumb.  A couple sketch comedy dudes try to salvage it and it’s visually pretty creative but the script is such a stinker.  Lot’s of gags about how bad the gags are, unsettling comfort with fillicide and uxoricide.  I could write better dick and fart jokes on no sleep.  This wannabe Meet the Feebles turkey (if I was Thankskilling 3 I’d say, “see what I did there?”)  The peice de resistance is an Evil Dead 2  parody.  The turkey muppet loses his phallus and replaces it with a chainsaw, he looks at the camera and says, “gravy”.  It’s a texturally arresting little piece of hate.  Honestly I don’t recall the 1st Thankskilling being much better though.

The Neon Demon

367645_m1472030102

Four stars

The hungry city, puking eyeballs.  Sweet, secret-witch artsploitation.  Baroque, stylish and the best kind of dumb.  Sad and vicious.  The neon demon lives in electrical currants coursing through toys for young girls.  The neon demon hangs out by the sea, walks around the salt flats, writes letters home.  Here’s the neon demon, his mouth on her mouth, her mouth on hers.

Da Sweet Blood of Jesus

mv5bmtg1nzy3mzkwnl5bml5banbnxkftztgwmdgxmty0mze-_v1_ux182_cr00182268_al_

Three stars

A street dancer spins to soft beats while cold earth crystalizes the hearts of the vampire lovers.  A tepid, mumblecore Ganga & Hess remake.  It starts strong, remain political, exudes malaise & solemnity, moves glacially.  Jesus saves and kills in equal measure.

Children of the Corn

mv5bmdg3otc2otqtzda0my00ytjiltg3ztytogywzwm1nwvhzddixkeyxkfqcgdeqxvymtqxnzmzndi-_v1_ux182_cr00182268_al_

Two stars

Hark!  The empty city!  The Menonite youth in the fields craving blood.  He who walks amongst the rows.  One of the more mainstream of the kinder karnage lot, notable for Linda Hamilton, some good suspense and production design and not a lot else.  Was novel enough to garner 8 sequels though.