The Care Bears Movie

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Two stars

Christian orphans ask Mickey Rooney for a bedtime commercial.  Outer space angels of the Ursidae family keep tabs on sad earth kids.  A magician is named after pasta.  Eventually the bears face off against a dark carnival run by murderous toddler sociopaths.  Some of the bears are bears and some of the bears are penguins, lions, raccoons, monkeys and pigs.

D by: Arna Selznick, W by: Pater Sauder, A by: Anne Marie Bardwell, Charlie Bonifacio, David Brewster, John Collins, etc… E by: Stephen Mitchell, Jim Erickson, Shelia Murray, Gordon Kidd, etc…, w/ Mickey Rooney, Jayne Eastwood, Cree Summer, Sunny Besen Thrasher, Bobby Dermer, Brian George, Janet-Laine Green etc…, 77 min, Canada, 1985

Mermaid’s Scar

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Three stars

Immortal frog flesh!  The blood of Mothers!  A strange woman on a hill, her nocturnal mysteries.  The day laborers have come by train to our seaside hamlet.  They swill our coffee and stand stoic with secrets but they work hard enough and soon we’ll have enough trenches for everyone’s peace.  That is, until the twisted carnage.  Always these mermaids and their twisted carnage.

D by: Morio Asaka, W & A by: Rumiko Takahashi, More W: Tatsuhiko Urahata, More A: Kumiko Takahashi, M by: Norihiro Tsuru, w/Jason Gray-Stanford, Lalainia Lindbjerg, Chris Turner, Janyse Jaud, Kathleen Barr, Terry Klassen & Teryl Rothery, 50 min, Japan, 1993